Broken

"Broken love is the most dangerous love. It will slice you open with every touch" - The Siren, The Original Sinners by Tiffany Reisz

Hauntingly true, I have thought of little else since I stumbled upon this quote. Michael, our lives, my life has been plagued with this notion. And, I think that it always will.

From the day we could remember, our lives have been filled with broken love. Going back and forth between two parents who hated each other yet whose love for us was endless was painfully heartbreaking. Screaming, tears, and not knowing who to trust plagued our childhood. Our parents' love, a true love that I desperately needed, was broken. 

Trying to piece together the love that I so desperately needed and wanted has fueled my life. Michael, as you know, I believe that love is everything. To me, love can conquer all. Despite our parents broken love, it was our love that helped me conquer our childhood. It was our love that was going to help fuel my future. It was our love that always made everything alright. It was our love until another love took over.

This new love, the love that I feel for my captivator rivals ours. Different yet surprisingly similar, the love I feel for him is so powerful, for I know that together we truly can conquer it all. I know that this love is the love that I've been looking for. It is the love that compliments yours, where together I feel whole and complete. However, I am not sure that my conqueror feels the same. Despite the retching heartbreak that occurs every time I think that we won't end up together, it is not this love that scares me.  

Michael, it is the love that we shared that scares me the most. Despite how many broken loves remain broken or are mended in my lifetime, ours will never be as it once was. Our love terrifies me as I have to live the rest of my life knowing that a song, a place, or even a moment in time can rip me open and strip me until I'm rendered speechless and vulnerable. It is this notion that makes living without you almost impossible. Our love once helped me conquer a difficult time in our lives. Our love once made me feel that everything would be alright. But it is our love that will always remain broken.

No fears and limitless, MHF