The Best Way to be Sad

I don't know why these past few days have become my darkest. I thought that after almost three years of losing you, my days would become brighter. I seem to not have reached rock bottom yet. My darkest days are still to come.

My days are filled with sadness  I am scared, struggling, stranded without you, Michael. I am not me but some lost puppy waiting for the right person to come along and help me with my grief. But what if that person never comes?

What if the person I am waiting for is myself? How am I to overcome my self torture, self pity, self destructiveness? I fear that I will never. I am destitute to always be sad, scared, struggling, stranded. 

No fears and limitless, MHF